I will be revising my essay #4. This is the main one I will be revising because there was some better points i could have made for a arguments about Congress needing term limits. A really good point my professor made in her final comments on my final draft was I could have talked about the attendance of Congress being a major factor on their poor performance. I will either take out the part of Obamacare where I was trying to make a point that the issues with Obamacare with Congress helped create the shutdown, or I will revise this part of the essay to the message is more clear. I will also be fine tuning some of my other points to make sure they are all clear as well.
The other essay I will be looking at the revise will be my 3rd one over a advertisement I could have been more clear on some of my point about the commercial. I also lost some points due not going over if enough looking for mistakes. This was the essay I felt I did the best on but got the lowest grade. So I will be revisiting this essay and going over the final comments to better improve the quality.
My overview of the first semester was it was not easy. For not being in school for over 10 years I am happy to say I will finish above a 3.5 GPA for the semester. I know I have room for improvement to be closer to a 4.0, but I truly see how hard that is really going to be. I am happy that when I saw myself struggling right away I went and got help. Chemistry and Algebra were the two courses I started having the most trouble with, so I went and got tutors. Now going into finals week, they courses are the ones I have the highest grades in. I went from a D in Algebra to a high B, I went from a low D in Chemistry to A. Overall I studied all the time, I feel I worked harder during this semester than I did when I was a District Sales Manager over 10 retail locations. But I had a very good support line, my wife and parents were all there pushing me to make sure I did well. And even though I have a long road ahead to finish my degree, it will be a rewarding one in the end. I have to keep my eye on the larger picture and listen to the support I have from such a great family. I truly feel blessed!
Overall I feel more confident in my writing. I learned useful techniques that will come into play for me later in life. Example using MLA format. Even thought I am a science major and I will be using mainly APA, they are similar and I have a good grasp on how to properly use them. In the first part of the semester we learned how to describe photo’s in great detail so the reader would not have to see the photo, but the words that were used would be able to describe the photo in enough detail that the reader could picture it. This I think was my favorite part of the semester, I have never done any type of writing like that to be descriptive. I enjoyed the essay we wrote on this subject using a personal photo.
This semester really fined tuned my writing. Even though I was not as happy with some of my later grades when I felt my writing was getting better. The grades were properly given. I have no arguments after I read the notes on each essay. I do look forward to our final assignment where we are doing a portfolio over a couple of our essay’s. I already know which essay’s I will be using for this assignment and look forward to having the chance to revision and see the results I come up with. Overall a good class learned a lot enjoyed the teaching methods and assignments. Oh, and of course the blog was fun too. I wish I would have put more time in it and been a little more creative, that is something I will need to work on, my creativity.
The weather played a big factor in my adventorous hunt this weekend. It was opening weekend for rifle for deer. But due to the weather,strong winds, thunderstorms and being too warm myself, my mother and step father had no luck yet. We still have a few weeks to get us a deer. The good news this weekend when go hunting it will be much colder. This wll help us to at least have a better chance.
When it is windy out, the deer like to lay down and no move. They could be consisdered nocternal, because they only like to come out at night and sleep during the day, But when it gets colder out, they like to walk around and eat and get water. But this weekend it was not the case. I saw one deer run up right behind me, as he was running and jumping I fired 2 shots. But due to him being so close to me, I didn’t have time to look down my scope to get a good shot. So I just pointed and shot. No Luck. I can still see the look on the deers face as he was running by me, I feel he was smiling knowing that there was a very little chance I was going to hit him. He knew exactly when to run by me, and so he waited til my back was turned before he jumped up. While this was a leasoned learned for me this time. Next time I hope to have a little more luck.
I find this essay disgusting. Selling children for profit and even for a “new dish” for the rich to satisfy their hunger is repulsive. There are many other political ways within a country, even back during this time period to have shelters and orphanages for kids to be raised properly, in turn they children have a better shot of not being a theif, or leave the country to go fight a war for another. Children in any society is the future of that culture.
Even the point where a women (breeder) can sell children when they are first born, and will be rid of any extra charges or taxes if they choose to keep the children after a year is wrong. I couldn’t imagine myself seeing a mother and her children on the streets wearing rags and begging. I know this must have been a very dark time in Ireland, but there had to of been better idea’s and ways to fix some of these issues than what this writer is proposing.
Even the point number six where there would be a inducement to marriage, they only want to do this to grow the fattest and healthiest baby’s for the market. While the wives are pregnant the fathers will be as fond of them as they are their mares in foal, thier cows in calf. This is sickning!!!
This weekend 11/16/13 is the opening weekend for Adult Rifle hunters. I have been preparing for a week to be ready for this weekend. My this past weekend I took my new rifle to the range to get some good practice in. Also to make sure my rifle was zeroed with my sights. It’s going to be a good weekend. I am hoping to bring some good deer meat home for the family to enjoy for the winter.
I agree with the history that Stanton has placed in this essay of womens rights in the past. I also agree with Stanton that these issues have been resolved. Here is why I feel that way,
Women now can do and have the right to do anything a man does. This is to include, going to college, hold a position in political office(maybe one day a female President). But the list goes on and on. Even jobs that are mainly male such as construction, or road work, the companies are required by law to have a certain percentage of female presents. Now what is not stated in this essay, is this history and changes to history are a reflection here in the United States. There is still other countries all over the world that women still do not have the rights of a man like voting and holding a proper job. But here in the United States these wrongs have been made right. Even so much as women are being able to serve in parts of the military that they have never been allowed. Example like being part of a Infantry unit or working on and submarine. These are just a couple jobs that women have never been allowed to work in because they are female. This is a slow intergration process, and good movie to give a person a better taste of what I am referring to is GI Jane.
I do feel that the wrongs of women’s rights have been made fair and women are now equal to man in the United States.